Emotional problems of college students: oral:
For a year and a half, he was a college student with his boyfriend. He had a part -time job and saved some money.Recently he changed his iPhone14, and I suddenly felt that he often painted me big cakes.Last year, my mobile phone was a bit stuck, saying that I would change my phone, but of course I did not ask him to buy it for me.It feels more seriously intended, so I will have a little expectation.During the winter vacation this year, my mobile phone broke and told him. He just comforted me and said: The old one does not go to the new one, and does not say that I want to buy a mobile phone for me, and then my mother bought me directly.
In the next few days, I learned that he bought a tablet computer in December last year (he never told me before, because he said that when he wanted to buy a mobile phone for me, how about the tablet?The computer is cheaper, I want to buy a tablet. But the tablet computer is not just needed for me, so I said it. I thought he wanted to buy it for me at that time. In fact, he wanted to buy it. In DecemberWhen he used his friends, I bought it directly).When he told me that when I had bought a tablet, I said what could be used for me. Of course, I haven’t used it so far, and I don’t want to use it.
Recently, I like to play chicken games, and I feel that the big screen is comfortable to play. I said that I will change a tablet to play chicken games in the future. He said to buy one.Because it was almost my birthday, he said that he had thought of what he gave me. Although he didn’t say it, it meant that he was a tablet. I was quite moved at the time. After a few days, he said that he wanted to change his phone to change his phone.EssenceHe said earlier as a tutor. He said that he had saved 5,000 now and was able to buy a mobile phone. Of course, he also bought it, so it also shows that he could not have the money to send me a tablet on his birthday.
Recently, Disney’s 100th anniversary doll was new. I brushed it to him and sent it to him. He said that he would buy it. I said that entangled to buy a doll or a pendant. He said that it would make me think about it.He asked me if he thought about it?I said no, he said to choose one, the two funds were a bit nervous.At this moment, I was a bit uncomfortable. He didn’t hesitate to buy a tablet computer and mobile phone. He was tense to the doll of one or two hundred dollars here.
So now I am thinking that he likes to draw a big cake for me.I suddenly remembered it now. I asked me a while ago if I wanted MacBook?I said that my computer was broken and of course I wanted it. Then he said that he wanted to buy it for me. He really wanted to buy it, not to draw a big cake, but now I think that he can buy it for him even if he buy it.
In retrospect, we go out for dinner. It is a common consumption. It cannot be counted as his dedication to me. It is usually a small thing.He gave me the most expensive gift should be headphones.In the face of this boyfriend who often painted me with big cakes, but not to make, what do I want him to do?I want to break up even if it stops loss.Is my idea right?
First of all, we can understand the confusion and dissatisfaction you encountered in the process of dating with your boyfriend.Now let’s analyze the examples you mentioned one by one and give some answers:
1. Boyfriend pays and gives gifts: My boyfriend is very good for you in terms of economy. He took the initiative to bear the cost of going out to eat and buy a small gift.This shows that he is willing to spend money for you, and he may want to use this to express his care and consideration.
2. Change the mobile phone plan: In the past, you mentioned that your mobile phone was stuck and said that he wanted to change the phone. He initially put forward suggestions for buying a mobile phone together to give you some expectations.However, when your phone broke, he did not say that he would buy you a mobile phone, but your mother bought a new phone for you.This may make you feel a little disappointed, because he seems to have considered buying a mobile phone for you before.
3. Tablet computer purchase: Your boyfriend bought a tablet computer in December last year, but he did not tell you.When he mentioned that he wanted to buy you a mobile phone, he also asked your views on tablet computers, maybe because he thinks that tablet computers are relatively cheap, so he wants to buy you one.However, you don’t need a tablet, and he eventually bought the tablet computer he wanted.When he told you that he had purchased a tablet, he said you could use it, but you didn’t want to use it.
4. Birthday gift expectations: You mentioned that he hinted that he had thought about what birthday gifts for you. You think it may be a tablet and moved to this.However, he later told you that he wanted to change your phone, which means that he may not have enough money to buy tablet computers as gifts during your birthday.
5. Disney doll purchase: When you see the 100th anniversary of Disney, you discuss with your boyfriend whether to buy a doll or pendant. He said that the funds are tight and let you choose one.You start to feel uncomfortable, because he did not show financial tension when he bought a tablet computer and mobile phone, but he showed capital tensions on the doll of one or two hundred dollars.
From your description, you can see that there are some contradictions and dissatisfaction between your boyfriend’s material expression and his behavior.He seems to give you some expectations, but in the end he did not fulfill these commitments, or his promise only stayed in verbal without actual action.This may trigger your questioning and distrust of his true intentions.When analyzing these examples, there are several important views that need to be considered:
1. Communication and clear expectations: you mentioned some expectations, such as changing mobile phones, tablets or Disney dolls.However, sometimes people may have deviations about expectations.It is recommended that you communicate with your boyfriend a frank communication to clearly express your needs and expectations to ensure that the two parties have a common understanding.
2. Money concept and priority: Everyone’s views and priority of money are different.Your boyfriend may give higher priority to certain items (such as tablet computers and mobile phones), while other items (such as Disney dolls) do not pay much attention.This does not necessarily mean that his care and dedication to you have decreased, and it may only have different views on the method of allocation of money.
3. His economic ability and goal: You mentioned that his boyfriend is a college student and earns some money by teaching tutoring.Although he has some savings, there may be other economic goals or needs.He may want to save some money to deal with future expenses or other goals.Understanding his economic situation and goals can help you better understand his behavior and decision -making.
In summary, your idea is not necessarily wrong, because everyone has different views on expectations and giving in emotional relationships.What is important is to communicate frankly with your boyfriend, express your feelings and needs, and try to understand his position and motivation.If you think your dissatisfaction and sense of distrust cannot be resolved, or these problems have always troubled your happiness, then breakup may be a choice worth considering.Only when you can judge when it is stop loss, it is crucial to ensure that you get a balance and satisfaction in your relationship.
